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What is Kitchen Sinking?

Kitchen sinking communication is familiar to most of us, since probably all of us have been on the receiving end of it. And unfortunately, most of us have used this destructive form of communication now and again.

Kitchen sinking involves throwing all kinds of events, or misdeeds of another person, at them all at once. In it's worst from a conversation about who's supposed to take out the garbage today might turn into a discussion of what someone did ten years ago. It's an extremely destructive way to communicate, because:

• it focuses on the past over which nobody has control
• it overwhelms the person on the receiving end, and the present issue almost always gets lost
• it destroys trust between people

You should know that kitchen sink communication is common, particularly in marriages, but it also happens in the workplace, and is a "normal" but unfortunate way of communicating. Often it happens because a person stores up his or her hurts or perceived slights, until the point when the tide of anger can't be held back. For some other people, kitchen sinking can be a way of trying to feel better about themselves, or to justify their anger, or feelings of being hard done by.

In any event it's a poor way to conduct oneself.